Commanding presence?
Yes
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OIL SLICK LOOKS LIKE DALE EARNHARDT
Local Man Discovers In Driveway
Hueytown() Hueytown resident James Whitcomb is unsure why he was blessed by the apparition of Dale Earnhardt in an oil slick on his driveway, but he feels that his hero would have wanted him to make the most of it. Whitcomb discovered the uncanny image last Saturday on the driveway under his 1969 Camaro. The car had been up on blocks for the last three years while Whitcomb was looking for parts to fix it. The oily image was revealed when Whitcomb got the car down and rolled it into the garage in case he wanted to work on it during the cold weather. "I'm pretty sure it's mostly oil," said Whitcomb. "There might be some tranny fluid and anti-freeze mixed in there." Whitcomb debated about using his pressure washer to clean up the spill, but some of his friends arrived and told him not to. They realized that the startlingly lifelike image could not be a coincidence and urged Whitcomb to share his good fortune with the world. At first only a few came, but as word spread, people from around Hueytown just started showing up to get a look.

It was then that Whitcomb decided to start charging for a peek at the miraculous wonder. "I wasn't going to charge people," said Whitcomb, "but then I thought about how I could use that money to help fix the Camaro. I think it is what Dale would have wanted." Many area residents were lined up behind the makeshift barriers in Whitcomb's driveway on Tuesday night, trying to get a glimpse of the perfect stain. Some were clearly upset at having to pay for the privilege. "Ten bucks is flat out robbery," said Hueytown native Dan Evans. "If it were someone like Red Farmer, or Neil Bonnet maybe it would be worth it. Don't get me wrong, Earnhardt was great, but he wasn't really one of the gang."

Whitcomb had decided to try and sell his discovery on eBay, and had even looked into the cost of having the concrete sawed, when tragedy struck. Whitcomb's truck was parked over the stain to protect it from vandals, but apparently the truck had an oil leak too. A little more fluid seeped out and completely reconfigured the driveway slick. Visitors have speculated about the shape of the new oil stain, but with no general agreement. "I think it looks more like Tony Stewart now than anything," said Whitcomb.